Deborah Gould was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s disease in 2016. She and her husband, Greg, live in Lakeside, and are determined to fight the stigma of Alzheimer’s. The blog post below is a day in Deborah’s life, in her own words.

By Deborah Gould

Imagine yourself in a day in the life of someone suffering from Alzheimer’s disease. Close your eyes. Now open them.

You awake in the morning, not feeling rested, and you don’t know what day of the week it is, what the date is, what the month is or even what year it is. You don’t remember what you had planned for the day. You get up and get dressed in one of the three outfits you wear regularly, ignoring all the other clothes in your closet. You go into the kitchen to make coffee, but you can’t remember where the coffee is. You feed the cats. Or did you already? You take the clean dishes out of the dishwasher, but you’re not sure where to put them.

You shrug your shoulders and go get the newspaper. You sit down with a cup of the coffee your loved one made and read the paper. You read the same article several times. You eat the breakfast your loved one made even though you are not very hungry.

You and your loved one go to your doctor appointment. During the twenty minute drive you ask him four times where you are going. At the appointment you are attentive and answer all the questions your doctor asks you. On the drive home you ask your loved one where you have been. When he reminds you of the doctor appointment you ask what she said. He reminds you the doctor is a man. You discuss what the doctor said, but you don’t recall any of it.

You stop for lunch at a restaurant. You look over the menu for a long time. You eventually decide what you want to order. When the waiter comes you order something else. You eat half of it because it doesn’t have much flavor.

When you get home you get anxious and start to have dark, negative thoughts. You cry. You feel angry. You feel depressed. Your loved one puts on some music and that, as it always does, lifts your spirits. You play games on your smart phone and time passes. You try to read a book, but you lose the narrative after a few pages and put it down.

When it’s time for dinner, your loved one prepares the meal because you can no longer follow the recipe, unsure whether you already put that ingredient in or not. The dish just doesn’t taste like it used to. Ice cream for dessert. Now that always tastes good.

After dinner you watch TV. Something on the news disturbs you. When the news is over you can’t remember what it was, but the feeling still lingers. You and your loved one decide to watch a movie. It will be a comedy because dramas are hard to follow and sometimes leave you feeling low.

When the movie is over you get ready for bed. You forget to brush your teeth. Once in bed it takes a long time to fall asleep. Once asleep you awake in a few hours, then again later.

You awake in the morning, not feeling rested, and you don’t know what day of the week it is, what the date is, what the month is or even what year it is.

Need support? Alzheimer’s San Diego is here to help. Talk to one of our Clinical Care Coaches by calling 858.492.4400 or emailing info@alzsd.org.